Relationship 101: who controls your relationship?


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The person who cares the least, Controls the relationship.

We all thought about this situation and we have it at the back of our minds, but we don’t talk about it. It is not something that couples talk about. You may be doing it already, you just haven’t realized it. It might also be working out to your advantage, but not all people have the same way of thinking. It also can be a complete disaster movie. (This only applies to serious relationships)

What I’m saying is, people react differently. Some might be OK with it and some might be completely offended by it. Some relationships are unconsciously doing it, and it might be working out for them.

My theory is that, successful couples has the right amount of care between the both of them, which created balance in their universe.

In my opinion, it doesn’t need to be equal, you just have to analyze your situation and figure out what works out for the both of you. I mean, Its really just finding the right combinations.

Now to answer the question, Yes its true and will continue to be. Its not always a bad thing, again if it works for your relationship and it creates balance, then it must be doing something right.

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Now, it doesn’t mean you don’t care at all, that’s different. It just means that you’re opening up some space for your partner to fill up. It sometimes the other way around, your partner may have some space for you to fill up. Key is don’t go over that limit, Just fill up whatever needs to be filled and stay within it. Some people tend to be overwhelming and most of the time their partners feel that they are obligated to match it. They will feel pressured and sometimes confused, which can lead to a breakup.

You may agree or disagree with this point of view. Keep in mind that this is just the technical side of things. Relationships are complicated that way. There are a lot of areas to be covered when it comes to this. Its just really a matter of perspective. We all think differently in different situations. This is just for those people who needs an answer to, “why things are the way they are?”. I hope to have covered that area.

Parenting 101 : Trust granted not earned


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What brought you to this article? Is it because you want to know if you’re making the right choices as a parent? or are you a soon to be parent?. Well whatever that is, you came here because you were curious. You wanted to increase your knowledge on something that you truly care about. Have you ever asked yourself,

Does my behaviour affect my children’s attitude?,

Am I being over protective?.

These are the questions that we will try to answer as we go along.

Does my behaviour affect my children’s attitude? The only way to answer that question is to put yourself in their situation.

When I was a child growing up. I never liked it when my parents never trusted me with anything. I could never understand why. It just never made sense to me. I was a good child. I always followed the rules.

Parenting frustration

There’s this famous saying,

” trust is not given, it is earned”.

I know most of us would buy into that, and part of it is true. But I believe that starting to build trust with your child at an early age is the right choice. let me explain.

Parents are responsible for building a good trust system between you and your child.

A good example would be my friend, lets call her Dona. Donas parents are very over protective of her. She never did anything wrong. She had a curfew at 6pm. She could never go out with her boyfriend late without having her sister come along. She knows that they are not doing anything wrong and that her parents are being unreasonable She felt like she had no choice but to lie to her parents so that they can be together.

That’s one of the reasons why we lie, and the reason why most children treated that way ends up being rebellious.

Now if you were to trust your child, make them feel that you trust them. You would get a totally different result.

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I, myself, would never do anything to break a trust. I value trust more than anything. I would be foolish to break a trust given to me without having to earn them. I think that would be a child’s initial reaction. That is why trusting them early is very important. Its putting them in the right direction.